I have always pursued knowledge. I craved new information and any bit of trivia I could find. A downside of this has been a propensity for gossip and rumor, urged on by an insatiable craving for the unknown. A positive effect, however, has been a pursuit of truth, which was a determining factor in my conversion to Catholicism. Whichever avenue I went down, it was always in pursuit of my own increase. Now, however, as I enter into marriage and think about my future children, I see now a better purpose to this: knowledge to pass on to my children.
It is easy to load up on information just to regurgitate it back onto others in an arrogant show of “intelligence”, but it is harder to pursue the true and good knowledge, which increases our love for God, and our ability to do good (and to love well) here on earth, and to use it for a real purpose. Not to know more, or to be known as “smart”, but to be genuinely helpful to people with your knowledge.
Now I wish to know more and to know more deeply, not from a place of pride (though the lion still prowls) but from a place of self-giving. I may not be the smartest man in the room at any given time, but I can at least hope to be the most desirous of thoughtful and well-formed children. Of having a legacy that outshines me in every way, including my knowledge.
Take good notes has been my new refrain, and I wish to utilize the Obsidian software as a second brain, so that I can leave behind my “mind” to my family once I’m gone. Will it be worth it? I think so. Just so long as it isn’t used to make an AI version of me. An abomination worth destroying.
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